When all else fails.

Last minute, you NEED a Halloween costume.

In my home, you can go into the storage room and scope out some costumes from the childhoods of four children. I'm pretty sure there's also an adult cow costume down there somewhere. But not everyone has a storage room filled with old costumes. It's time to get creative, and quick. Here's some witty costumes that require minimal effort, but will give you much praise from your friends.

1) Nudist on Strike- Dress in average clothes. Hold a picket sign with the words, "Nudist on Strike."
2) Lemon Surprise- Write the word, "LIFE," in black marker on a plain white t-shirt. Carry around a bag of lemons, while occasionally handing one out to someone.
3) Serial Killer- Dress normally. Get a giant plastic knife to keep in your back pocket. Your punchline is, "I'm a serial killer, because you can never pick them out from the crowd."
4) Leaf blower- Wear a hat, and tie one end of a string to the top of it. Tie the other end to a leaf from outside, so it hangs in your face. Blow the leaf out of your face.
5) Quarterback- attach a large picture of a quarter on your back. Football not required.
6) Game Show Contestant- Make a large nametag, and put it on the front of your shirt. Say things like, "I'd like to buy a vowel," or, "That is my final answer."
7) Pothead- Put a pot on your head.
8) The Lost TV Remote- attach a couch cushion to your front, and one to your back.
9) Refridgerator Magnet- Paint a shoebox black, and attach it to your back.
10) Cable Guy(for the party you don't want to go to)- notify friends what you are going as. Don't show up, because they never do.

And when you still don't have plans, just invite friends over for scary movies. Feeling ambitious? Do a group session for learning the Thriller dance. Whatever you do, make sure you have fun, because Halloween only comes once a year!